The Band - 'Don't do it'

This is the same song with which The Band ended their career, as an encore at their legendary 'Last Waltz', Thanksgiving Day show in 1976. Think this UTuber is from a show about six months earlier though. Obviously this is a practise run... Rick Danko's opening bass lines are as funky as anything and when the drums and piano really lock in, it gets even better.

Anyhoo, It's a 'Holland-Dozier-Holland' Mowtown tune which was first made famous by Marvin Gaye. Levon Helm (the only American in the group does the honours on vocals).

Always wonder how great that The Band could have been with a second guitar player to compliment Robbie Robertson, and why Richard Manuel doesn't sing a note on this tune (Rick Danko seems to have to improv on all of the harmonies, even though Robbie had a really decent high tenor voice and does a couple of falsetto bits), but there you go....

Rolling on the river - Italian style

One of the worst cover versions of all time. Even 'Ireland's Got Talent' would reject this.

Lucio Battista makes an interesting attempt at the John Fogarty classic 'Proud Mary'. Sadly Lucio doesn't succeed, despite appearing to have the entire La Scala philharmonic orchestra at his disposal and also the Italian version of Bob Dylan (Lucio's brother, I think) and what seems to be the complete cast of the Italian version of 'Hair'  backing him.

I'm not bragging but I could seriously do a better version on my banjo or ukulele. But then again, this is from the country that regards Zucherro as a musical genius (and also gave us Mussolini)....

2009 - Top 5 good and bad sh*t list

Well, as the year is almost ended, here is a list of my perks and peeves:-

Bad Sh*t:

1. Getting made redundant for the first time in my life in May 2009.
2. Trying to deal with truely ignorant pen-pushing public servants in the dole office who ask questions like "are you really doing anything to find a job?", even though I didn't apply for benefit for 4 months (out of some stupid sense of optimism and pride) and have 15 years worth of continuous PRSI stamps. I haven't claimed or received  a cent from the state yet. Think that early 2010 will see me visiting those scumf*cks with a solicitor by my side. I spent a couple of years in the public service after Uni, so know exactly how ignorant some of the 'servants of the state' can be. Hope in 2010 that they get massacred (guards and nurses aside) and that the Senate gets abolished.
3. Jedward (need I say any more) and the fact that nobody has tried to assasinate Louis Walsh yet. Surely some religious fanatic or republican extremist can help with this? Also, the return of of talentless, gurning midget Robbie Williams to the world we call pop, although it looks like he's pretty much finished now. 
   
4. Joe Duffy's 'Funny Friday' radio show.  Is there any worse example of Licence-Payers' money being completely washed down the toilet?
   
5. Channel-flicking on the TV and constantly coming across 'Play TV', '2 Pints of Lager...', 'Top Gear' or any of those heavily scripted Panel Shows like 'Qi' or 'The Panel'
   

Good Sh*t:

1. Judicious and successful online gambling; Also, adult Japanese porn - keeps getting better and better - especially the stuff they do live on metro trains!
   
2. Getting to see P-Funk live (George Clinton - you are the man and always will be!).
3. All 5 seasons of 'The Wire' shown on the BBC. Was great, as my multi-region DVD player had packed up at the time.
4. Irish Catholic Bishops resigning in droves. How my heart wept!
   
5. The respective demises of Michael Jackson and Jade Goody. Again, my heart was broken. "Good for you!"
   

Fat Larry does Zoom

Not many things that make me weep a couple of tears these days but this is one.  Great Philly funk/soul/pop music from my childhood; 'Fat Larry' James is the bandleader and drummer. Not much of a surprise that he kicked the bucket at an early age  - (think morbid obesity) :-(

The lead singer looks really like DJ Spoony.

Great fun entirely, Ted!

You couldn't really make this up.  Bogshite, apparently-retarted  Parish Priest sobs on hearing of the (somewhat enforced) impending resignation of  the Bishop of Killaloe, Dr Willie Walsh. Perhaps they'll be coming for him next?

His accent is so muck-savage that it's hard to make out what he's saying/sobbing. but he seems to want to convey to us that the beloved bishop has been a 'saviour for the country over t'last 15 years';

And at the end - "We just love the man - he's so cut". Perhaps the good bishop is a body-builder and the reference is to his physique; either that or he was circumcised particularly well?.

Also loved his opening line in this interview which seemed to have been 'We loved Willie...'. I think that loving willy (particularly those attached to 4-16 year old boys) is what got a lot of those perverts into this situation in the first place.

Wonder also what kind of name Mrs. Doyle would guess for this creature:-

• Fr. Girly McSqueek
• Fr. Harry Hysterical
• Fr. Krai Baby
• Fr. Tony Twit
• Fr. Big Eejit
• Fr. Psycho Sicko
  Fr. Who's GoingToApproveMyExpensesNow
• Fr. Billy BogShite
• Fr. Willy Lover
• Fr. Kiddy Fiddler
• Fr. YoungAnus Adorer
• Fr. Bishop Licker
• Fr. TheyLeftTheFarmToMyBrotherSoIhadNoOtherOption

Dark was the Night, Cold was the Ground

This is the legendary 'Blind' Willie Johnson, recorded in the late 1930's, doing the truely disturbing, aethereal 'Dark was the Night...' (a tune based on an old African-American spiritual originally referred to as 'Gethsemene').  Probably the most seminal piece of music recorded over the past 100 years (aside from Westlife's stuff, of course)...

I try to play along on slide to this on my Dobro sometimes but can never finish it for some reason - it's weird as I can get the notes & tuning down fairly easily, and it's not as if there are many words to remember, but it is almost like an impenetrable wall of sadness hits half-way through.

Willie was an itinterent musician who endurded a pretty horrific life of abuse and poverty, and died pretty young but his music had a huge influence in later years - Led Zeppelin, Ry Cooder, Duane Allman, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Rev. Gary Davis, Fairport Convention, Clapton, Jeff Beck, Rory Gallagher and so many other great people were deeply influenced by him.

A recording of this tune was allegedly included in a capsule sent into space on the 1977 Voyager flight. Am still waiting for it to land in my back garden or at least somewhere local (hopefully on the head of Louis Walsh).

Welcome to Listowel - Europe's #1 spot for Hen Parties

The mayor of Listowel blames all of this fuss and nonsense on the advent of the mini-skirt, Nell McCafferty, Marian Finucane and Sinead O'Connor.

"Ask not for whom the window squints..."

Not much to say about this really - those 50 odd filthy, backward shits who shook that guy's hand in the court room should be thrown into the sea. At least the mad priest got shown the door...

Really shameful how some of the inbred residents of that town are all over the Interweb insinuating that the victim 'had a history' and was essentially 'asking for it'.

It makes me so proud to be a citizen of this country:-(

http://www.listowel.ie/

Bill Cullen to cull Bishops

Following shocking revelations in the Ryan and Murphy reports, documenting instances of historical child abuse and years of cover-ups by the Irish Catholic church, TV3 have developed a unique new quality TV show, hosted by self-made millionaire used-car salesman, Bill Cullen.

Bill and his expert team (Marty Whelan,  Lorraine Keane and Brian Dowling from Big Brother 2) will interview and  critique 10 existing bishops and attempt to find one with any sense of moral decency.

The impressive prizes for the winning contestant will include:-

• One year's free consultancy from Mr. Cullen's top PR person, to advise on ongoing damage limitation.
  
• A luxury hamper from IrishHampers.ie.
• An all-expenses, 2-week stay at a Phillipines orphanage.
  
• A complete new wardrobe from the 2010 John Rocha 'Vatican' collection.

The 9 losers will be forced to resign from their posts immediately and will be sent to work as missionaries in the Democratic Republic of Congo or Liberia.
"I don't give a feck about your 'Pastoral Reflection'.
By the end of this, 9 of yiz are out of here."

Tiger Woods - close shave

Poor old Eldrick Woods. Sundry bimbos are coming out of the woodwork to tear holes into the illusion of his perfect little wholesome American marriage. Expect a tearful appearance on Oprah soon...
Tigers's various conquests line up at the offices of the National Enquirer to spill the beans.

The world's blandest high-profile sports person is reported to be self-flagellating with a pitching wedge in an attempt to obtain forgiveness for his 'transgressions' and 'sins'.

I'm putting this down to the curse of the odiously cheesy Gilette shaving advertisements he did with Thierry Henry and Roger Federer.

Three extremely smug tossers.

Play TV - JG is gone?

Wow - It seems that JG Murphy has resigned from TV3's late night flagship rip-off quiz show Play TV.

JG does 'Spot the difference' for the very last time.

Like many, I had warmed to him eventually as the most competent of their presenters. Think he will probably have a decent career in the media. It took some skill to be amiable for 3 hours every night while presenting that car-crash...

So we are left now with the not-so-bright Northern girl who dresses like a tramp (with varicose veins) and has a horrible adenoidal Belfasty accent and the almost equally thick red-headed girl Fiona. It just won't be the same again...